Corinne
Posted: Jan. 14 2007, 13:04 ET
Hi All,
I have been thinking this morning about what motivates us to continue on with this trek we have embarked upon. I have come about 1/2 way to where I ultimately want to be. I am hoping that this will spur some insight into what makes each of us go the distance. My biggest motivation to date and still seems to be the thought of how I felt about myself before I started this program. To say the least my self esteem was trashed, basically to the point of going out of my way not to participate in things as I was ashamed of how I looked. The thought of going back to that makes me cringe and keeps me towing this line (so to speak). I hope to hear from some of you about what it is that makes this so compelling to continue.
Have a great day and thank you in advance for any insights you share.
Corinne
Angela
Posted: Jan. 14 2007, 13:23 ET
Great Topic!
My biggest motivator is how I look and feel. I love being thinner, it makes me feel so good to be able to walk into a regular store and buy a medium. I find people more engaging, strangers look you me in the eye and will start a conversation where as when I was bigger that didn't happen.
I guess I had somewhat low self esteem when I was bigger, never really comfortable going to the mall, certainly never wanted to go swimming, conscious of what I ordered on a menu when out with others besides my family. Only go through the drive through at the fast food places so people wouldn't look and think, no wonder she is overweight, look at what she eats.
Now I feel great and (toot my own horn) look great and I want everyone to see it.
Thanks for starting a topic that made me look inside a little bit.
Michelle
Posted: Jan. 14 2007, 13:25 ET
I started this for me as I too was hitting rock bottom as far as self esteem goes, avoided social functions, repeatedly in and out of depression, was tired of always meeting losers on the man front as I was settling for whoever would take me. I decided I was going to lose the weight & get in shape as I thought it would make me happier - it just kind of all fit in together. I'm at the point now where I look good, feel good and could very well say I'm done & be happy with it.
However, this journey as made me realize some other things about my life .... I have a great job but it's not what I've always wanted to do in life. I grew up wanting to be a police officer but becoming a single mom at 19 kind of threw a curve ball into that. Now my son is all grown up, I'm getting into shape & getting myself to the point of being able to pass and the required exams, etc. no longer feels like a hopeless cause. I figure I can get to where I need to be by summer time, start applying to the different forces and do a complete career change before I even turn 40! So bottom line is, this journey has taught me that it's not too late to attain that dream that died about 18 yrs. ago.
Besides that ... I have a few nah-sayers in my life that don't think I can maintain this and aren't shy about letting me know that. I see that as a "challenge" and I have the kind of personality that no one should ever challenge - don't tell me I can't do something as I will now do everything in my power to prove them wrong !
Angela
Posted: Jan. 14 2007, 13:34 ET
Good for you Michelle, sounds like you have cleared some challenging hurdles in life and are charging full steam ahead. Keep up your hard work and determination and you will fulfill all of your dreams.
nickns2
Posted: Jan. 14 2007, 14:00 ET
Health.......that's pretty much it. I'm a big guy but I don't mind being a big guy.....the only reason I'd like to lose the weight is so that I don't take a heart attack when I'm 40 or 50 years old.
Phill
Posted: Jan. 14 2007, 14:08 ET
This is a great thread. Your stories are inspiring!! Thanx for sharing them.
I've always been "big" from as young as I can remember....but I've been a superweight for the past 2-3 years, to the extent that I fear loss of mobility.
Anyway, the big push is that I'm going to New Zeraland in March, and the thought of those teeny, weeny airplane seats has me in a cold sweat. If I can drop 40 lbs, that'll put me at the weight that I was when I last took a plane ride. Still a tight fit, but not impossible if I have a seatbelt extender.
Once I get back, I will move on to my next motivator: to be able to play with my sweet grandbaby, Grace. She's seven months old now, and will soon be toddling, and moving faster than Nana can keep up with. 
~Phill
glenna74
Posted: Jan. 14 2007, 14:16 ET
Health: I don't want to drop dead of a heart attack. My oldest kid is only 4, so I have lots of years I still need to be around for.
Bathing suit: I live on Lake Simcoe, have a family cottage on Go Home Lake, and we have acreage about 5 minutes from Lake Rosseau.
Clothes: I'm sick of having to pay $30 for a t-shirt, and hundreds for dresses, plus the shipping from getting cool stuff from Torrid, since neither Torrid nor Hot Topic are in Canada.
Michelle
Posted: Jan. 14 2007, 14:36 ET
My son drags me into Hot Topic every time I am in the states .... hmmm maybe I should look around now as some of that stuff will fit!
Corinne
Posted: Jan. 14 2007, 15:23 ET
Thank you all so much for your thoughts. I am so pleased to hear that I am not alone and share many of the concerns that you share. And of course I had to look up Hot Topic on the net and that is rather dangerous isn't it?
Ha ha ha.
Have a super Sunday afternoon!
Corinne
dainty
Posted: Jan. 14 2007, 15:56 ET
for me, i have never EVER been a small person. i am tall as well so have always been the "big girl" in the group. i had been the same weight for as long as i can remember (bouncing from 210 to 190 pounds and back again). right now i am a person that i have NEVER been before.
health is a HUGE thing for me. i am so excited and proud that i am someone who CRAVES veggies now... i feel healthy, i feel normal, i love to cook and plan meals! maybe after i finish this i will become a vegetarian (most members of my family are, but i have always hated cooking and loved fast food, where most of your options are meat). my bad cholesterol is too high, but slowly & surely it's getting out of danger zone.
i know it's a stupid little thing, but my motivation is being able to wear a sleeveless shirt! have never in my life worn a sleeveless shirt because i am too sef-conscious about my arms.... if this diet makes that possible THAT will definitely be life-changing because in the summer i would love to be able to feel cool and show off my tattooos!
and as for hot topic, wooo cool clothes!! ha ha i love how everyone on this board is sooo different!! but still we understand each other's problems and goals. imagine brian in hot topic gear?? hee hee woooo!
i am planning on ordering ONE sexy outfit from www.lip-service.com as a reward!! hee hee. i have NEVER been a single digit size... and i have a feeing i am verging on an 8 right now.... i feel weird!
Michelle
Posted: Jan. 14 2007, 16:33 ET
Hmmm ... maybe I'll have to take Brian to Hot Topic when I am in Florida so he can get something to surprise his wife with his sexy new body !!!
CarolP
Posted: Jan. 14 2007, 17:25 ET
1st thing comes to mind is health. but there are so many others as well... i want to feel sexy, get into normal size clothes, be able to fit into public transit comfortably. Even though I am still a big women, people treat me different than when I was 293.6. Men hold doors open, staff in retail look me in the face when I am dealing with them, kids don't stare at me and say "Mommy that lady is FAT" I dint' want to be the FAT lady anymore. Never want to go back there. Self esteem... I'm not sure when that will come, it took a long time to get this fat, I believe it will take a while to feel good about myself. I am looking forward to the challenge. Great Topic Thanks!
bernicem77
Posted: Jan. 14 2007, 19:26 ET
I started this diet because of health. I am terrified of getting diabetes.
I've always been big, and decided that I need to be healthy before I turn 30. Since my 30th is comming up in a little more than 6 months, I think I can do it. Who am I kidding, I know I can do it, even if I do have a couple of slow weeks.
And as someone else said before me, not buying a t-shirt for $30 is great motivation.
b
BrianB
Posted: Jan. 14 2007, 19:44 ET
Quote (Michelle @ Jan. 14 2007,16:33) Hmmm ... maybe I'll have to take Brian to Hot Topic when I am in Florida so he can get something to surprise his wife with his sexy new body !!!
Hahahaha, well, I already spend plenty of money in Hot Topic, but it's not on clothes or body jewelry or nose rings, or whatever. My wife is an avid collector of collectibles from the movie "Nightmare Before Christmas" and Hot Topic has quite a selection.
That said, here are my "motivators":
1. Health: diabetes, high blood pressure, etc. Things were starting to look not so good. I didn't really care and was determined to just ride the fast lane into the ground, but apparently others were bothered by that.
2. Fitting into a world built for slimmer people. The world is accommodating larger and larger people as the years go by, but not people the size I was. Having to buy two airline tickets for 1 person, always putting the arm up in the movie theater to take up part of an extra seat, dreading being brought to a booth in a restaurant that I'd never be able to fit into, the embarrassing misery of not fitting into seats obviously designed for teen agers at college, etc., etc.
3. Clothes. Clothing was a major pain. Everything is huge, and expensive, and even finding things was very difficult. I went to Montana one year for Christmas with my mom's side of the family and, being a Florida native, had no appropriate "snow wear" at all. About $1000 later and 4 mammoth suitcases and I was all set. Even then I couldn't get truly appropriate stuff (like a waterproof full body suit) and had to settle for what I could get (see pic below). Of course everyone else could just use rental gear when we rented snowmobiles, but I had to bring my own because otherwise I'd just not be able to play.
4. Getting hot chicks. Wait, I never had any problem with that and I'm married. OK, forget that one.
Below, me sticking out like a sort thumb with my sister, uncle, and soon-to-be-aunt (guess which one is me - hahaha). That ugly butt brown body suit pretty much took up an entire full-size suitcase by itself. It also sucked that everyone else could walk on the snow, while I always sunk in and had to walk through it. You can even see it in this pic a little. Ugh.
post-3-21841-Christmas_2004_BB_36.jpg (image/pjpeg)
Pamela
Posted: Jan. 15 2007, 00:04 ET
I know I haven't technically started the diet yet, but like everyone, one of my main motivators is health, also like alot of people in here I've been the big girl my entire life, I'm only 23, I want to wear a bikini, I want to shop in any store I want, and like someone already said, I don't want to spend $30 on a t-shirt any longer, like.. come on, I'm fat, I'm aware of that,... but coming from a family of sewers... they don't use THAT much more fabric that they need to charge a fortune for the clothing. I think though that the biggest motivator will be to be able to ride again, I've been big my entire life, but I'm at the point the past few years that I wouldn't even think about riding. I used to ride and compete in the jumping circuit when I was younger, all my coaches said that I had the potential to go far,and I even owned my own horse, but cost of riding and other issues ended that .... so last year, I picked up, moved to Calgary (Spruce Meadows) and as soon as I am able to do so, I'm getting back up on a horse. That's the one single moment that I can not wait for... and who knows I might be inviting this whole board to come and watch me compete one day!
Sara
Posted: Jan. 15 2007, 02:20 ET
Great Topic!
My motivation comes from how I feel about me. I never thought I would be one of those people that avoided social situations but that was what I had started doing. I would go out to the movie with a friend or two but never out with a group. I never wanted to see people I hadn't seen in awhile because I had gained so much weight. My self esteem was hitting rock bottom and it was affecting all my relationships. ( work and personal) I was becoming moody and thinking everyone was against me.... quite pathetic really. Also the last few time I had flown anywhere the seatbelt just fit! ( and I do mean just) The other thing that got me really motivated was the thought of my birthday. One of my co workers had a birthday this past summer and the office bought her a shirt to wear that day. I started thinking, "they can't do that for me...what size would they buy??? XXXL??" I guess I just really started seeing how weight was affecting every single aspect of my life. I thought I can fix this. If I had a terminal disease I would do anything I could to try and stay healthy. Well my obesity was a disease and I owed it to myself to do whatever I could to try and get healthy. So now my credit card it stretched ( between Dr. B. and new clothes) but it has been so worth it!
Phew...that got long!!!
Cheerios
Posted: Jan. 15 2007, 09:36 ET
Weight has been an issue in everything I do, for as long as I can remember. There have been so many things I haven't done, because I felt I was too fat. If someone was cold or mean to me, I wouldn't think it was because they were jerks, I'd believe it was because I'm fat. If people are laughing across the room, it's at me. Just everything. This fat has consumed me. My whole life.
And you know what? I'm done. I'm done with this holding me back from things. I'm done with the fat swallowing my self esteem. I'm done with being the fat friend. The fat mom. The fat wife.
My motivation is freeing myself from the confinements of fat.
deb_109
Posted: Jan. 15 2007, 11:57 ET
Well said Cheerios, I very much feel the same.
You go girl
Matthew's Mommy
Posted: Jan. 15 2007, 12:06 ET
Nicely put Cheerios!
My main motivation is my son. I shutter to think he would ever have to answer to anyone about his fat mom!! Kids can be so cruel. Plus my husband smokes and I have no right to ask him to stop if I have an addiction too.
Cozumel21
Posted: Jan. 15 2007, 18:47 ET
I have been fat my whole life, up and down like a yo-yo.
I spent the last 5 years carrying this weight as I tricked myself into believing I was happy and fine the way I was.
This time for me I will say it is my job / career / future that motivated me. I feel my weight was holding me back at getting the promotions and future I want.
This time, I know I will succeed at "Making a Great Lifestyle Change"
Bailey
Posted: Jan. 15 2007, 22:04 ET
Great topic ...
I share some of the sentiments that others have shared. Like Dainty, I am looking fw to wearing a sleeveless shirt in public for the first time in forever. I lived overseas for over ten years, and the weight piled on and on. I gradually went from 135lbs. to 215lbs. Moving back to Canada has afforded me the luxury of Dr. B, healthier eating options and the support of my family again. My father passed in June. He was overweight his whole life. Four years ago he had a quadruple bypass and earlier this year he had a kidney transplant. He always told me to lose the weight while I was still young and before the onset of diabetes. I wish he could see me now, the smallest I've been in a very long time. I really miss him but hope that he would be proud of me.
Gitmo
Posted: Jan. 16 2007, 09:42 ET
Ok, I'll take the low road and be shallow.....
Like my tag reads. I JUST WANT TO LOOK GOOD NAKED.
Yeah there's the health thing, and the clothes thing. Heck I haven't had my shirt off in public since the first Regan administration! But it all comes down to vanity. I want to be able to look in the mirror and think.. "yeah, I'm do-able". hahaha. Everything else will fall into place. The clothes will make me feel even better. I'll be healty and not want to just stay in but actually go out in public.
Actually I'm a little afraid of what I'll become. I know I have the tendancy to be a real pompus a##. I know I'm smart. I've got a good job. Heck! I'm a catch!* The only thing that has kept me humble has been my belly. Once that's gone the world won't be able to contain me. Muah hahahaha (evil laugh).
*=at least my mom always said so. hahahaha 
Bumblebee
Posted: Jan. 16 2007, 13:33 ET
Right now I have a lot of motivation... for all the reasons that everyone else has already talked about... my health, my two beautiful kids, my self esteem, my husband. But I am so very AFRAID of losing that motivation.
I first started Dr. B last spring at 236 lbs and I did great. I got down to 200 lbs in no time. Then, for whatever reason, I lost all motivation last summer. I quit going to Dr. B, always with the intention of re-starting next week, but next week never came. Now here I am in January re-starting at 224 lbs!
I just want it to be different this time. I NEED it to be different this time. I have been reading all the posts of people who have started at a similar weight as I am now, and to see them almost at goal is so inspiring! I am hoping that by joining this group and starting to post, I will have to be accountable and hopefully stay motivated for the long haul.
Does anyone else have trouble with long term motivation? Or any ideas or suggestions? 
CarolP
Posted: Jan. 16 2007, 14:07 ET
Gitmo your funny! Love it!
BumbleBee... I will speak for myself... BUT I am sure most feel the same way. YES YES YES motivation for the long haul has always held me back. That's how I got to be 293.6lbs. I have tried to loss weight all my life, up and down and up even higher again. For me it's a mind set, I start to loss and look a little better and fear slows me down. I think hummm maybe I am going to feel so different about myself that I won't know who I am. Or that people will treat me different and I won't know how to handle it. Fear of the unknown. Here's what I've been doing... its helped me not sure if it will help anyone else. I don't focus on me as much as I did before. I don't spend minutes in front of a mirror, I want to see me at my goal weight. I will look closely then. This is a temporary body size and shape... it feels better and functions better BUT not where I want to be. And I pray for God's will in my life. Good luck!
MichaelW
Posted: Jan. 16 2007, 16:43 ET
Alright, I'm going to join in on the motivation train... All aboarrrrd!
1. I have a wife that I'd like to get to know better after the kids are grown and gone on their path.
2. I have four kids that I'd like to participate in life more (we already go swimming and stuff, but I'd like less restriction on our choice of activities - snowboarding, roller coasters, horseback riding, etc.)
3. I'd like to travel and not be mortified of what people think as I jam my big ol behind in seats in coach class (being 6'5" is a double whammy, crushed knees and fellow passengers). I usually beg them to block the seat next to me if the flight isn't full - I haven't had to pay for two seats yet. I'm going to Vancouver in a couple weeks and dreading the plane trip out.
4. Clothes! Like anyone else - I wish for clothes that I could express my personal style in, rather than accept what the big & tall stores bought this year.
5. Cars! It should would be nice to drive something other than my Dodge Pickup, I understand head room increases when you loose the big pillow butt you've been sitting on for so long.
6. Bikes! I have a 2003 Honda Shadow ACE that I didn't ride this season because I'm over the weight limit.
7. Beaches! Shirtless on the beach, playing a little volleyball - I could handle that.
8. Anonymity - Being able to go out in public without innocent comments from kids, and their embarassed Mom's uncomfortable glare.
Teenagers and buttheads would be less compelled to roll down the car windows and shout crap at me when I'm riding my bike I'm sure!
9. Self confidence - I'm already a cocky bastard, overcompensating for my physical appearance, I've become egotistical in other areas (work, money, etc.) - I hope being "average" size will help balance that out.
10 I could go on and on, but need to get some more work done today!
Ciao for now!
M.
ROBIN
Posted: Jan. 19 2007, 17:25 ET
My Motivation's are so many! I want to be healthy and live forever for my daughter and my fiance. I want to be the person I was before I gained all the weight. I would love to look forward to my wedding instead of dreading it due to my weight. I want to look like I feel! Thanks for asking this. I needed a reminder to keep me focused!! :D